Divorce is hard for the whole family, especially children. But that doesn’t mean divorce can’t be a growing experience for everyone. The key to helping children understand divorce is to answer their questions. Here are some common and difficult questions you may encounter from your kids, along with a few suggestions on how to answer them:
- “Are you and Mom / Dad getting back together some day?” This question might surprise you, but it’s very common – especially among younger children. Make sure they understand that divorce is not a phase. It’s permanent, but it won’t change your relationship with your kids. How to respond: “We are not getting back together but Mom and Dad are still here for you.”
- “Will I live with you?” When faced with divorce, your child may not fully understand how his / her life is changing. Even if you don’t know the specifics of your child custody and visitation agreement yet, you can provide a simple explanation of the new living situation. How to respond: “Instead of living in one home like we do now, you’re going to live in two homes.”
- “When?” You don’t need all of the answers to talk to your child about divorce, but it’s important to give a specific answer if your child asks “when are you getting divorced?” That way, you can provide an exact time-frame, such as “We’re going to pack up the moving truck in three weeks. I can show you how many days are left on the calendar right here.”
- “Why are you and Dad / Mom getting divorced?” For many parents, this may be the hardest question to answer, mostly because you might be asking yourself the same thing. Even if you fully understand why the marriage failed, talking about it openly with your child may be painful. How to respond: “Because we want each other to be happy, but we can’t be happy anymore if we’re together.”
If you’re considering a divorce, speak with our team of family lawyers in San Diego, California. We’re passionate about helping families and have more than 200 years of collective experience. Our solutions are cost-effective and timely, so you can have confidence your case will move forward smoothly and efficiently. To learn more, call our office now at (858) 492-7968 or contact us online.